Are you feeling a little lost now that your kids have left home? You’re not alone. Many parents find themselves asking, “Who am I now that my children are grown?” It’s time to redefine yourself and create a new “Why” in life. In this blog post, we’ll explore how to take this new chapter of your life and make the most of it.
In our last article we talked about helping your child find their path. From the time your child is born until they leave the nest, it’s not uncommon for parents to tie up their “Why” in things that involve spending time with the family. It’s a beautiful thing to watch them grow and reach their full potential, and there’s nothing more rewarding.
There comes a day though (for most parents at least) when the kids leave. You may find yourself feeling a bit adrift. Sure, you still want to be a part of their lives, but your “Why” has shifted. Sure, you still want to be part of your kids’ lives, but they aren’t the prime motivation for every action anymore. It can be a disorienting time, but it’s important to remember that it’s natural to feel a little lost.
If you need a new “Why” once the kids are grown, but you’re not sure anymore who exactly you are when they’re not around, this article is for you. Let’s explore some ideas for finding your “Why” in this new chapter of life. It’s time to discover yourself and all that you can be!
Is there still some parenting expectation even now?
Just because the kids have flown the nest, it doesn’t mean your parenting duties are over. Are you expected to be a babysitter for the grandkids? Are your adult kids still coming to you for advice? Your “Why” might not have changed as much as you first thought. Are you happy to still fulfil these roles for them? If so, then take these expectations into account when you plan your future.
What interests did you put on hold?
Are there hobbies or activities you’ve been putting off during the parenting years. Are you finally ready to try something new now that you have a bit more free time? If you’re not sure, it might be time to explore some new ideas. Check out the local library or college for classes and activities tailored for adults. From lessons to lectures, you can explore different hobbies without necessarily having to commit to something long-term. Look for beginner classes and taster sessions to “try before you buy”.
What talents have you hidden away?
Did you enjoy creative activities before the kids came along? Perhaps you played a musical instrument, or enjoyed painting, or dabbled in amateur dramatics. If you haven’t picked up your guitar, your paintbrush or your theatrical makeup in a while, it’s time to find out if you still enjoy it. See if you still get the same satisfaction from it as you used to. Give it a go and see how it feels!
What inspires you?
Do you have causes that tug at your heartstrings but you haven’t had a chance to get involved? Now’s your chance to make a difference! Consider volunteering at whatever level fits in your life right now.
What have you dreamed of doing?
Do you have big dreams that you’ve been putting off for too long because you simply didn’t have the time for them? Your new “Why” might involve making some of those ideas a reality.
The transition to life after your kids leave home can be daunting, but it can also be a great time to self-reflect and redefine yourself. Don’t be afraid to take the plunge and create a life you love. After all, you deserve it!