Author: srayner

When stress starts to get too much, “pressing pause” is often a necessary action. Many of my clients have aches, pains and health conditions that are made worse by stress. I often discuss with them the need to make time for themselves.

I’m currently in exactly that same position. Last week a close family member had a stroke and so I’m making a 4hr round trip a couple of times a week to help support them. I’m also still seeing clients that were already booked in. I need a little down time to make sure that my own health doesn’t suffer and so I’m going to take a little time away from blogging to give me that extra space.

One thing I will share for now is that very quick action was taken. Although assessment and rehab are still ongoing at the moment, it could have been very different without that prompt action.

Strokes can happen at any age. Yes, they are more common for older people but they can also happen to younger ones too. Risk of stroke is also higher in the weeks following Covid infection (and for up to a year after) so it’s worth knowing the symptoms so that you can act FAST.

“FAST” (Face, Arms, Speech, Time) is the test to quickly identify if someone is having a stroke.

• Facial weakness: Are they able to smile normally? Has their mouth or eye drooped?
• Arm weakness: Can they raise both arms?
• Speech problems: Are they slurring their words and do they understand what you say?
• Time to call 999: if you see any of these signs.

Let the 999 responder know the tests you have tried and that you suspect a stroke. You could save a life!

I’ll be back blogging and sharing tips with you once I’m sure that we have proper support in place at the other end.

And if you’re feeling a little stressed yourself, don’t shy away from pressing pause.

Staying in the moment is key to increased productivity. Read on to find out why staying in the moment can help you get more done versus multitasking.

Remember when multitasking was all the hype? In the 90s, productivity experts told us that juggling multiple tasks was the way to go. They said that the most successful people could do multiple things at the same time. They also claimed they could do them all well.

Books have been telling us that multitasking can help us make the most of our time. That it can improve virtually every aspect of our lives. We were promised we could do more in less time, leaving us with more time to do the things we actually want to do.

After years of raking in billions from self-improvement products, the truth about multitasking was finally revealed.

It was found to be a productivity killer. Studies have shown that the key to getting things done efficiently is to focus on one task at a time. Just take it one step at a time and before you know it, you’ll have accomplished a lot with minimal effort. It’s a simple yet effective way to make the most of your time.

Giving All Your Attention to the Current Moment Is All about Focus

There’s some age-old carpentry advice: “Measure twice, cut once”. This advice can be applied so much more widely. It’s basically a way to avoid costly errors. By checking your “workings out” you don’t have to shell out extra cash for lumber you accidentally cut too short or too long.

When you’re about to cut that piece of wood, all your attention should be on that moment. Don’t let your mind wander to your upcoming holiday or what you’ll have for dinner. That can cause you to make a mistake. Be present and focused on the task at hand – nothing else matters.

Then you measure it again. Your focus is so intense on getting this right that you understand the importance of double-checking your work. This is a simple example of living in the moment. The best workers in any field are present in their current actions. They understand that letting their minds wander could lead to an incorrect measurement. That at best, means having to buy more materials to replace their mistakes. Some mistakes can have even more severe consequences.

If you want to increase your productivity, the key is to focus on the present. After all, that’s the only part of life that you can actually control. Don’t worry about the past, and don’t stress about the future – focus on the moment and you’ll see your productivity increase. It’s time to take control and make the most of the here and now.

Mindful living is all about being present in the moment and focusing on the positive aspects of life, rather than letting yourself get overwhelmed by the negative. By taking the time to be mindful, you can create a sense of lasting happiness and build up your self-esteem. In this blog post, we’ll explore how to create lasting happiness through mindful living.

Living a mindful life can be incredibly rewarding. According to a Psychology Today article, there are numerous benefits to being mindful. Not only can you reduce your stress levels, but you can also lower your risk of developing various illnesses and diseases.

As it turns out, you’ll enjoy life more while benefiting from healthy relationships. According to the research Psychology Today performed …

“Mindful people are happier, more exuberant, more empathetic, and more secure. They have higher self-esteem and are more accepting of their weaknesses.”

If you’re not feeling those emotions right now, that’s okay. Acknowledging where you are today can help you get to a better place tomorrow. The key is to stay mindful and take it one step at a time.

What is Mindfulness?

Let’s look at an example of mindfulness in everyday life.

Have you ever been in a rush to get through a meal? Perhaps you had something coming up that needed your attention, so you opted for something quick and easy. You managed to wolf it down and immediately pushed yourself forward to your next present moment.

How did the food taste? What was the aroma like? Were you dining with a friend? What did you talk about? Were there sights and sounds you overlooked as you wolfed down your food? The point is that you probably didn’t notice many of these things as you rushed your food down.

These questions all point to missed opportunities.

We’ve only got this moment, right now. The future isn’t guaranteed. Why rush through the present moment when it can deliver so much for you to experience?

That’s what mindfulness is all about.

You’re mindful of the present moment. You give it the attention it deserves, because that’s what life is – a series of moments.

Reflecting on the past can be a great way to learn. It’s wonderful to reminisce on positive memories from your past as a way to recreate those amazing experiences.

There’s a lot to be said for preparing and planning for the future. However, the future isn’t guaranteed.

Mindfulness helps you stay focused on the present and not get too caught up in your thoughts. After all, some thoughts can keep you from making the most of what’s right in front of you. So, don’t worry about the future or dwell on the past – embrace the here and now.

Research from Psychology Today shows that mindfulness can help boost our self-esteem and bring us more joy. Plus, it even makes us more compassionate towards others. After all, the past is already gone and the future isn’t promised to anyone – so why not take advantage of every moment?

Life can be hectic and it can be hard to stay present in the moment. With the hustle and bustle around us, it’s easy to get caught up in the past or future. We may forget to take a moment to appreciate the present. Give yourself the gift of being present. It can help you stay in tune with yourself and the world around you. In this blog post we’ll explore 3 reasons why it’s important to be present and 3 simple ways to practice it.

Existence can be a tricky concept for us to wrap our heads around. For most of us it’s enough to be able to grasp the concept of a past, present, and future. We understand we’re living right now. Our life is like a movie, playing out before us. We use our senses to take in the world around us.

We’re in the present now and we have memories of a past existence. We have hopes and plans for our future. For most of us, that’s what we know about life.

Deep thinkers tell us that all we have is the present moment. Your past is gone and you can’t fully control your future. All you can do is live in the moment. As it turns out, embracing your present reality has a lot of benefits. Here are three reasons why you should spend more time in the present moment and three simple ways you can do just that.

3 Benefits of Embracing the Moment

Better Relationships and Improved Social Skills

Focusing on the present sharpens your vision. You start to appreciate the people around you more deeply, even those you don’t interact with often. This can help you cultivate better social skills and build more meaningful relationships.

Less Stress and Anxiety

Mindfulness can be a real game-changer when it comes to reducing stress. Instead of worrying about the future, savour the present and enjoy the moment. It’s a simple but powerful way to live life with less stress and more peace.

Greater Self-Love and Self-Esteem

Mindfulness helps us become more in tune with ourselves, which leads to greater self-awareness. You find you have so much more to appreciate about who you are right now and fewer expectations of your future self.

3 Simple Ways To Live in the Present Moment

Breathe Deeply

Take a few deep breaths and focus on them. Appreciate the simple act of inhaling and exhaling; this is a great way to calm your racing mind. Next time you feel overwhelmed, take a few moments to practice mindfulness, meditation, yoga, or any other practice that helps you stay in the present. It’s a great way to reduce stress and relax.

Practice Daily Gratitude

Take a moment to appreciate all that you have. From the big things to the small, there’s plenty to be grateful for. Make it a habit to recognise and express your thanks for the good things in life. This will help you stay in the moment and focus on what you already have, rather than wanting something more in the future.

Forgive Yourself and Others

Forgiveness is all about letting go of the past and not having any expectations for the future. That’s the secret to truly living in the present moment and making the most of it.

Being present can be difficult, but it is an invaluable gift. It can help us to be more mindful, to be more connected to ourselves and to others, and to live with greater purpose and joy. By taking the time to pause, to take a few deep breaths, to practice gratitude, and to be forgiving, we can start to enjoy the gift of being present. The more we practice, the more we can learn to savour each and every moment.

This month we’ll be taking a closer look at “living in the moment”. We’ll touch on mindfulness and meditation but there are more parts to being present than just those. This is a great time of year to think about this topic as we are likely to be spending more time than usual with our friends and family over the holiday period. Being present with them is a wonderful gift to them and to yourself.

Living in the here and now has a lot of benefits. Taking a moment to pause and really appreciate your current reality can be an incredibly calming and enlightening experience. This has been used as a spiritual practice for thousands of years to raise self-awareness. It’s a powerful and natural stress reliever. Being mindful of the present moment has been proven to reduce high blood pressure and improve cardiovascular health.

Even with those significant benefits, many people people still struggle with being present. They spend more time looking backward and/or forward. That’s because there are a few misconceptions out there that can make it hard to stay focused on the here and now. Let’s take a look at three of the most common myths about living in the moment.

Being Present Isn’t About Being Impulsive

As your environment changes around you, the present moment changes with it. This can make some people think that living in the present means shifting from one thing to the next. But that’s not the case at all.

Embracing the present doesn’t mean going with the flow without a second thought. You take it all in. Let it happen. Engage your senses and pay attention to the moment. You’re conscious and mindful of your present state and the environment around you.

This doesn’t mean you have to take action.

Embracing the present doesn’t mean changing to be someone else. You don’t have to act on a whim, copying the behaviours of the people around you. Rather, you observe and understand what it all means for you, if anything. If the environment warrants action at that point, then you are taking it mindfully, not impulsively.

Being Present Isn’t Selfish

This is not a self-serving practice. You aren’t “doing” or “not doing” anything to serve yourself. You are simply allowing the present moment to include you. It’s all about being in the moment.

In the toughest of times, you can take a moment to appreciate the simple fact that you’re still alive. Each breath is a reminder that you can still make a difference in this world. Instead of focusing on the problems, take a step back and recognise the power of being alive. This gratitude can help you cultivate a more generous spirit and a less selfish attitude.

Being Present Isn’t about Laziness

Being present doesn’t mean neglecting your responsibilities. You shouldn’t use it as an excuse for not taking action. Take your responsibilities seriously. You have obligations that you must meet to ensure your home and family are taken care of. Spending time in the present moment doesn’t mean lazily shirking those responsibilities.

Living in the moment doesn’t mean recklessly ignoring the future or living an irresponsible life. It simply means taking the time to be mindful and aware of the present and savoring it for what it is. By appreciating the here and now, you can reduce stress, increase happiness, and get to know yourself better.

Whether you decide to adopt an everyday ritual from here or here, or you decide to create your own, there is a final, important step to take – making everyday rituals stick. In this blog post, we’ll explore how to make everyday rituals stick, so you can start living a healthier, more productive life.

Making a change or starting a new ritual isn’t too difficult, but actually sticking to it and making it a habit? Now that’s the real challenge. Coming up with the idea is the easy part, but making it a regular part of your life? That’s where you have to put in the effort. It’s not enough to do it once, or even a few times. You have to keep at it until it becomes second nature. So that not doing it feels uncomfortable. That’s the only way to make it a true ritual.

There’s no secret here, folks – just good old-fashioned repetition. Do something enough times and it becomes hardwired into the mind and turns into a habit. That’s all there is to it. The word “all” is doing a lot of work in that sentence, of course, because sticking to a new habit is hard.

Here are a few tips to make it easier.

Keep It Simple

Rituals don’t have to be complicated to be effective. Simple rituals are easier to keep. They take less time, focus, and preparation, which means that you are more likely to follow through with them. The more complicated you make things, the less likely you are to follow through.

Work To Your Strengths

Don’t try to force yourself to become something you’re not or aim for a routine that won’t fit in with the rest of the family. That’ll only lead to failure. If you’re a night owl, don’t expect to suddenly become a morning person by deciding to go for a run every morning. A smarter move would be to switch up your routine and go for a run after lunch or after work.

If you want to stick with a new routine, work with yourself instead of against yourself – it’ll be much easier to stay consistent.

Schedule It

If you want to make sure something gets done, put it on your schedule. Treat your new ritual like any other important appointment – like a doctor’s visit or a vacation – and pencil it in for multiple weeks ahead. That way, you won’t be able to use the “I ran out of time” excuse.

Use Reminders

Even if you’ve scheduled it (see above), it can be easy to overlook things when life gets busy. Try setting up reminders on your phone or calendar to help keep you on track.

Reevaluate

If you’re having difficulty sticking to your routine, it’s time to take a second look at it. Maybe the ritual you created isn’t quite right for you. See if you can tweak it to make it more manageable. If it’s still not getting done then maybe it’s because you aren’t giving it a high enough priority. Do you really want this ritual or are you doing it to please someone else. We’re all short of time but we make time for the things that really matter to us. Does this matter to you? If not, then adopt or create a new ritual that better serves you.

By implementing these tips, you can succeed at making everyday rituals stick. Whether it’s a morning routine, a self-care routine, or something else, having a set of rituals in your life can bring you a sense of peace and stability.

Have you had a hard time finding rituals that resonate with you? Do you feel like the ones we’ve explored so far “just aren’t quite there”? In this blog post, we’ll explore some tips to help you create new rituals that work for you and fit your lifestyle.

Ritual design is something that you will get better at as you practice it. The more you work with rituals, the more you will understand them and yourself, and the easier it will become to pull a new ritual together.

These pointers will take you one step closer to becoming a master of ritual design. Incorporate them into your practice and you’ll start to see immediate improvements in your rituals.

Keep It Simple

When it comes to daily habits, keep it simple. Save the frills and fuss for special occasions and holidays – you don’t need a team of helpers to get your morning routine set up. The easier it is, the more likely you’ll be to stick with it.

Make your everyday rituals as simple as possible. Cut them down to the bare minimum. This will help ensure your success.

Go With Your Gut

Listen to your intuition when considering a ritual or part of a ritual. Does it feel right? Will it bring you joy? That inner voice knows best.

Instinctive feelings come from your subconscious processing things too quickly for your conscious brain to assess. Your instincts are usually right, so don’t ignore them. Listen to your inner voice and go with your gut.

Be Honest With Yourself

If you want to make your rituals really work, it’s essential to be honest with yourself. That means being truthful about who you are and what you want. It can be tough, but it’s the only way to get meaningful results.

Don’t try to be someone you’re not — that’s a common way to fail. If you’re not a morning person, don’t force yourself into an early-rising ritual. Be true to yourself and don’t set unrealistic expectations. Acknowledge and accept who you are, and you’ll be much more successful.

Ignore Negative Comments

Discussing rituals, let alone crafting and executing them, can sometimes be seen as a bit eccentric or out there by others. If you mention your practice to others, you might get some negative comments. But that’s okay, those people aren’t living your life. Do what’s best for you and ignore the judgments of those who aren’t part of the equation.

Creating new rituals to serve you doesn’t have to be difficult or overwhelming. Start small and be consistent. Find the ones that work for you and your lifestyle and make them part of your daily routine. With a little bit of effort and dedication, you can create new rituals that will make your life easier and more enjoyable.

We all have habits, rituals, and routines that we’ve picked up over the years. Some of these habits are helpful and supportive, while others can be unhelpful and even detrimental to our wellbeing. In this blog post, we’ll explore how to recognise rituals that no longer serve us and develop strategies for shedding unhelpful habits.

Not all rituals are created equal – they don’t work for everyone, all the time. Sometimes a ritual can be effective for a while, then suddenly it stops being helpful. Other times, the benefits of the ritual fade away gradually. Either way, it’s important to be aware that rituals can come and go.

How do you know if a ritual is no longer serving you? How do you decide that you need to give it up or change it? These tips will help you.

What function is the ritual trying to serve?

A ritual needs to serve a function. They help us stay connected, keep track of time, and create a sense of predictability. So, take a minute to think about what purpose your ritual is trying to serve. What are you hoping to get out of it?

Does this ritual serve its function?

Take a moment to assess the ritual’s effectiveness. Is it achieving its intended purpose? Is it doing so in an efficient manner? If the response to either of these questions is no, then the ritual is not serving you.

What benefits are you getting from this ritual?

Rituals are meant to bring about tangible advantages – psychological and sometimes even material. Pause for a second and ask yourself: are you reaping any rewards from this ritual? If not, then again, it’s not serving you.

If you are, look at how strong the benefits are. Are you getting the most out of the ritual you’re doing? Are there better ways to reap the same rewards? Take a closer look and decide if the benefits you’re getting are worth the effort.

Does the ritual create harm?

Are certain rituals causing you or others harm? We’re talking about psychological or even physical damage here. Think of those addictive substances-related rituals; smoking, drinking (alcohol) and even sugar addiction. They are all harmful and would be habits worth breaking for your future health.

Strategies for shedding unhelpful habits

Once you realise a ritual isn’t working for you, it’s time to make a change. Breaking habits isn’t easy, but it is doable. It’s all about recognising the need for change and taking the steps to make it happen.

Our brains are creatures of habit and they don’t like change. Even if the ritual you’re trying to break isn’t doing you any good or is even hurting you, it’s still filling up your time and giving you a sense of routine. So, if you want to break an old habit, the best and simplest way to do it, is to replace it with something new.

Take a minute to consider what purpose the old ritual was meant to serve and what it was supposed to give you, be it emotional or practical. Then, see if you can find something else to take its place that could do the same job, or even better. Do any of the examples here or here fit the bill? If not, why not make up your own ritual that will do the job?

Instead of defaulting to your old routine, you need to remember to to use the new ritual. Set yourself up for success by creating a reminder – whether that’s a phone alarm, calendar notification, or a sticky note on the wall. That way, you won’t forget to switch things up.

Releasing an old habit can be a challenge. It’s alright if you slip up every now and then; that’s normal. Don’t get discouraged if it happens, just keep pushing forward, shedding the unhelpful habits until you get there.

We all need self-care and there’s no better way to show yourself some love than by creating meaningful rituals. Self-care rituals don’t have to be complicated or time-consuming. They just need to be something that helps you take care of your body, mind, and spirit. From a simple yoga practice to taking a hot bath with essential oils, there are countless ways to practice self-care and nurture yourself. In this blog post, we’ll explore the art of self-care and how to create meaningful rituals that will help you stay balanced and grounded.

Taking care of yourself should be a top priority. You cannot effectively take care of others if you’re not taking yourself. It’s like the airlines say, “please put on your own mask first before helping others”.

Taking care of yourself doesn’t have to be complicated or costly. Anything that nurtures your physical, mental and/or spiritual wellbeing is self-care. Even getting a good night’s sleep counts! A self-care ritual is just something you do to take care of yourself on a regular basis.

The following self-care rituals are just a few examples. Feel free to modify these rituals to fit your needs, or come up with your own unique ways to show yourself some love.

Listen To Your Body

This is a really great self-care ritual as it helps you to monitor your health so that you notice changes. Taking the time to check in with yourself and pay attention to how you’re feeling is so important and is a skill that you get better at over time. Make it part of your daily routine to pause and really listen to your body. Don’t wait until something goes wrong – like an injury or illness – to take note. You deserve to be mindful of your wellbeing.

Ideally, choose a time when you can be alone and find a place to relax. It should be quiet, though you can put on some music if you like. Close your eyes, calm your mind, and concentrate on what your body and mind have to say. Do you have aches? Anxiety? Tension? Is anything out of sync? Make this a regular routine and you’ll be better equipped to spot changes and take any necessary action to look after yourself.

Thinking Time

Most of us don’t take the time to just sit and think. We’re so busy with our day-to-day lives that we forget to take a step back and reflect on our choices, actions, and dreams. It’s very important for our mental wellbeing, yet we often overlook it. Who can blame us when we’re so busy? Taking a few moments to just think can do wonders for our mental health.

It does require prioritisation. You can find time if you give it a high enough priority. Put it in your calendar and make sure nothing gets in the way. If it helps to get it done then put on some music and get yourself a cuppa but take the time to relax and think. Spend 10 minutes or so just reflecting and getting in touch with your thoughts.

Make Time For Play

It’s time to get playful. As adults, we still need to make time for play. Whether it’s a hobby, a sport, reading, or gardening – make a ritual out of doing it and schedule it in. But only if it’s for your own enjoyment and not a chore or task to be ticked off. What’s your favourite way to play? Make it a priority and have some fun. My hubby and I have started a Sunday ritual of building some lego together. I’m sure it’s not everyone’s idea of fun but it works for us. Bonus – it’s fun time shared with each other.

Creating meaningful rituals can be a great way to make sure you’re taking care of yourself. It doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive – it just needs to be something that brings you joy and makes you feel good. Whether that’s listening to your body, taking time to think, or time to play, make sure to take time out of your day to practice some self-care. You deserve it.

In the last blog post I shared some examples of everyday rituals and now in Part 2 I’m sharing a whole bunch more. Feel free to adopt and adapt these if you find them useful. We’ll also be taking a look at how to create your own rituals from scratch in a future post.

Here are a few more examples of everyday rituals. Millions of us engage in these everyday rituals without even realising it. We just do it, or at least a version of it. As you read through just consider your own variations for each. There’s a good chance that you do some of them at least, but in your own way.

Leaving and Coming Home Rituals

Most of us have our own little rituals we do when leaving and coming back home. It could be something as simple as grabbing your keys from a specific spot, putting on your shoes and shouting goodbye to the family. And when you come back home, you may do the same things in reverse. When I lived in Sheffield my husband and I used to have a ritual that we could talk about work until we reached the petrol station on the outskirts of the city and then no more work talk.

Work Rituals

These are rituals people perform when they first arrive at work, right before they leave for the day, and/or sometime during the workday, every day without fail. For me at the start of the day, it’s switching on the heating in the clinic if needed, opening the blinds, pulling couch roll over the couch, testing the client bell and putting a Lateral Flow Test out for the first client. For others, it might be stashing their lunch in the fridge, grabbing a cup of coffee and checking emails. Whatever it is, it runs like clockwork.

Meal Rituals

Most people have a meal ritual. From setting the table a certain way, perhaps saying grace, arranging food just so, to clearing dishes away straight after eating. Your own ritual may even have more detail to it. Do you eat a certain food type first, or save a certain food for last? I generally try to eat my veggies first so that they’re done with and I can look forward to the meat and potatoes.

Reflection Rituals

While not as popular as some of the other types of everyday rituals, many people have a regular reflection ritual. For some it’s formal written journaling, for others it may simply be taking 5 minutes to sit down and think about our day. Reflecting on our recent actions can help us gain insight into how our lives are going and what we can do to make them better. It’s a great way to stay in tune with ourselves and our goals.

End-of-Day Rituals

At the end of the day, most of us have a ritual we do without even thinking about it. We do the same thing, in the same way, for the same purpose – to close out the day – whether it’s changing into comfy clothes, brushing our teeth or reading a book in bed. It’s just something we do, and it’s become part of our daily routine.

Rituals are a great way to bring more mindfulness and intentionality to your everyday life. From taking a few moments to reflect, to creating a morning routine to helping you wind down ready for a good night’s sleep, there are plenty of examples of everyday rituals that can help you transform your life for the better. I hope that the examples of everyday rituals I’ve given here in part 2 help you to recognise the ones you already have in your life.